Friday, June 23, 2006

Some Things You Didn't Know About Lastings Milledge

During Thursday's Mets game Chris Kotter told fans about Lastings Milledge facts, a website that reports some previously unknown info about the Mets future star. Gary Cohen felt the need to emphasize that these were facts in quotation marks, because some people don't understand sarcasm.
This internet craze started most hilariously with Chuck Norris, then moved on to the awful Jack Bauer and even one for Phillies Phenom Cole Hamels.

While I was skeptical of these copycat sites I must say that the Milledge site does have mostly original work, a large percentage of which is actually fairly amusing.
42. Jim Duquette says he wouldn't trade Lastings Milledge.
60. Lastings Milledge traded Kaz Matsui to the Colorado Rockies.
139. The 11th Commandment: Thou shalt not run on Lastings Milledge.
159. Lastings Milledge once hired Donald Trump to be his personal bat boy....after a week Lastings said, YOUR FIRED. Yes, he said "your" instead of "you're." Despite his super powers, grammar has never been Lastings Milledge's forte.
309. Lastings Milledge loves asian chicks. Actually, he loves all chicks. He is Lastings Milledge!
312. Lastings Milledge was the only black person to appear on Beverly Hills 90210.
325. Lastings Milledge went to Geno's Cheesesteaks and ordered Vietnamese food, in Japanese, while wearing a turban. He was not only served, he is now the customer of the year.

And the best one was pointed out by Kotter...
311. Lastings Milledge was the captain of Tom Emanski's back-to-back-to-back AAU national championship teams.

How Lastings learned to throw so well

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